Learning to love is a process we are all on.

If you project onto me, or others who you think have the perfect relationship, and then try to live up to that projection, you’ll get burned every time.

It’s more realistic to be where you are at, student, learning, growing and finding your way.

Yes, find people who you believe are a bit farther along than you that have great tools, but watch the tendency to think they don’t flail or have their issues resolved. We haven’t. I haven’t.

I transform one challenging issue, and then I fall from grace and I’m on to facing the next challenge in my marriage or with my kids.

But damn, when I relax into this, my life is so alive and ever changing. It’s like a river, sometimes raging and full, even flooding, and then sometimes, trickling, almost dry. 

But the aquifer is always there, deep down underneath.

Life is like that, like an ever-changing river.

So, go find people who are like a river.